Team Romney 2012 — ‘Channeling Dad’ Or ‘Growing A Pair’?

Soon_My_Pretties

“Did Santa-Newt already sell tickets on his Rocket-Sleigh To-the-Moon? You should always put that kinda thing on a credit card — that way when you pull your lips up off the floor you can reverse your mistake faster than Mitt Romney on Any Given News Cycle …”

“Maybe he can reverse himself yet again — his loyal ‘fasters’ might see a (low blood sugar-driven) path where Willard can carve out the middle voters for himself; at the risk of alienating the extreme Right. He’s done that before, of course — back when he was desperate enough to get in the U.S. Senate he actually tried to run to the Left of Ted Kennedy. Oh, wait — bad example: Willard lost that one …”

(OMG! An optimist!! Never mind — maybe the learning curve will contact THEM …) “The Tiffany Goober strikes again. False bravado that belies a modest and paper-thin Georgia heritage; Newt is painfully aware he’s an outsider to those who for generations have had oh-so-many hang on their every word …”

(Is Team Willard worried we’ll find out the campaign is just like every time the car elevator hits bottom — and Willard keeps forgetting to jump?) “Is anyone still seeking confirmation the 1% have never been able to spot the nuance between ‘salvage’ and ‘salvation’? No shock of surprise here; it has just as much to do with their laser-like focus on the bottom line as (who is deemed worthy of) entitlement. Speaking of which — we’ll be expected to forgive this Marriott guy his ignorance — after all; he (was likely asked to tap into his own humanity and) tried his best to make Mittself seem more human. It would be pathetic if it weren’t so doggone funny …”

“Don’t think he didn’t go over his donor list in his head before he came up with THAT Mitty rejoinder …”

“Mitt Romney has a debate platform coming up he can use to ‘walk it all back’ and run from Obama’s left. Oh, wait — that was a GEORGE Romney flashback; not Mitt growing a pair. My bad …”

“How many times before breakfast has Newt pledged to compare himself to Saint Ronnie?”

“Is Willard prone to bouts of tempting fate? Or could this be the legendary “Vote For Me; I’m Trying Out TRUTHFULNESS For A Change” gambit?”

(Sibling rivalry? Will the circus ever leave town?) “Truthfully, I didn’t realize Bay Buchanan was still considered relevant to any political discussion — let’s assume someone canceled at the last minute? Did Dave say okay when she said she’d spring for Danish and coffee?”

(Someone has steered me wrong — what else is new?) “I heard from a MO native that the rural half pronounced it one way, the urban half the other way. Neither pronounce it ‘Misery’ — that’s all down to me and my amazing superpower of persuasion …”

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